talking to myself

August 22, 2008

it doesn’t make sense….

Filed under: Life, people — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , — crazygina @ 4:22 pm

I would understand if there was something really bad that I was doing… like taking tons of drugs, throwing my money away, getting drunk every night, not taking care of my health, anorexic, being suicidal or something like that, which was detremental to my well being… but well… I’m not.

Going out and partying … and drinking and/or hooking up sometimes with people as a single 24 year old in this world.. I don’t really think is that much of a bad thing. At least not enough for someone to berate you and tell you that you need to “grow up”…. especially someone with a college degree, my own apartment and my own buisness.

We only live once. We get the chance to meet new people – have new experiences – have a good time – HAVE FUN – enjoy life. I have my entire life to grow up….and even then… I’m not making any promises.

I really really don’t see my behavior worthy of intervention, especially when the behavior is partially instigated by someone else.

When I think back to some of the times I did bring people home – a few times it was just to piss off my roommate because I was mad at him… and then he reams into me for doing it – so obviously it worked to piss him off but it just makes him talk shit…. didn’t really serve it’s purpose too well.

Anyway – I will live my life how I want to – do what I want to – I don’t live with my parents or my brother and I don’t want to deal with a roommate that is going to make me feel like I am living with my parents. I moved out when I was 15 so I could live how I want.

Hopefully this weekend is relatively chill. I am looking forward to just getting all this crap out of my system and actually having a conversation with my roommate instead of an argument. If he wants to continue to cut into me – fine. I will be a ball of steel. I am just pissed he keeps putting me through this. You know what they say though – misery loves company.

I am happy. I am enjoying life. I am getting a new job. I get a 2 week vacation or so – I have to reschedule my shows – but overall things are okay. I have had to deal with show drama before so this is nothing I can’t handle.

Just like life. Bring it on.

State Fair tomorrow. Wine slushies, overpriced food, good people, exhibits…. YYYYYYYeeesssss!!!!!

August 21, 2008

dance it off?

Filed under: Life, random — Tags: , , , , — crazygina @ 12:26 pm

When dancing it off goes wrong…..

Ugh I don’t like when I get all drunk and crazy and dance all up on dudes. I mean… it’s fun at the time – but then I look back and I’m like.. damn, that was slutty.

Oh well.. it’s not like I took them home with me. *plead the fifth*

Anyhow – I have my going away lunch today with my work people – at Joes Crab Shack in Old Sacramento – that place is so good. I am a little hungover so food sounds really good right now.

I am really excited about the upcoming shows – my friend Eve has been such a blessing in helping me get things going promotion wise. It’s great. I feel a little bit relieved.

Well… I just wanted to post something real quick. I am happy though. 🙂 that’s good.

July 22, 2008

I hate that….

It really bothers me when people who are your “really good friends” use that against you when they are upset. I understand forgive and forget, but I really feel like I am being projected onto because of other people’s personal issues.

Anyway – I think I am going a little boy crazy lately and this is a very new thing for me. I have never really been actively distracted by men too much – but for some reason I’ve been just out and about and feeling like I could actually go on a date or two. I never date. I just don’t. I just have always kind of felt like when you met that person you’re supposed to be with – you’ll know .. and so dating around has never really appealed to me. But.. now I’m starting to think … crap! I have been single my entire life… maybe I should let myself date…? It’s the weirdest thing for me … so I guess I just have to try it out and see if I like it or not. There isn’t any other way to find out except just experiencing it I guess. Although – thinking about dating boys/men is starting to distract me. I know that I am a big flirt already so it’s just making it worse. oh geeze.

At least I am still doing what I need to do – taking care of work, and my shows. Working hard. I have two interviews next week (THANK GOODNESS) for new jobs since I lose my job in about a month.

I am antsy right now.

I took a nap in the park this afternoon and meant to only sleep for an hour but I wound up being out there for two hours…. it was actually kind of nice, but I wish now that I slept in the shade. I like being hot though. It feels good.

I went dancing again last night – I love dancing but I have to stop getting so intoxicated so that I can have more fun and not make an ass of myself or be dancing all up on people like I was last night. Not looking forward to those pictures. oh man. I asked Nick not to post them….but I doubt that he really cares.

Anyway – I better get back to work.

July 11, 2008

Schmoozin’ and Boozin’

So I went to this “industry” party last night at a record studio. It was fun to get there and do the whole who’s who. To walk around giving everyone the head nod, the “HEY!!!!” and the subtle eye contact. Most people I knew, but there were a few I had the opportunity to meet and network with.
There was an open bar at the studio. Free beer…. free wine… and after everyone had left and it was just me and two of the bands, the owner, and maybe a few stragglers, they busted out the patron. THAT I could have done without.
I went to bed around 4 and woke up at 7. I am at work right now. Reeeeaaalllly loopy. Not sure loopy is the right word for it. HA! I just found out that my plans tonight are cancelled and oh man I have never been so excited about that in my entire life. So now I get to FINALLY relax before the huge party tomorrow night for my two dozenth birthday.
Work should be slow. Not much do to and I get to leave at noon. On a side note, but directly related to this post, the party last night was really really fun. It’s nice to hang out with people who really care about the scene and to converse with them…. talk about ideas and thoughts … and how we’re all in it together. It was very unifying…. really motivated me. It was a great night.
I had a fabulous time at dinner with Janice beforehand, and I wish I would have known they were going to have a smorgasboard of free food at this studio, but hey I did get out of there with some free wine and beer in my backpack. WOO.
All in all I give last night a 8.9 out of 10 stars.
Sweeeeet.

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